How much does Zhang Ailing say that “people are not bad and do not take responsibility” destroy marriage?

My girlfriend, Xiaomei, got divorced. This incident really surprised everyone. Not only did she get married early, but her married life also looked very happy and sweet. Her boyfriend Dongzi is her college classmate, and their fairy lovers are very famous in school. Dongzi is an introvert, but he is a student who is well praised by the teachers. Although Xiaomei has mediocre grades, she has a lively and active personality, and she is outstanding in the student union. By the graduation season, everyone else was very busy looking for jobs. Not only did they get a good job smoothly, they also got married before graduation. The days after marriage are also very moist. Every time Xiaomei meets with us, Dongzi will pick him up. Although I didn’t say a few words to us, it gave others a calm and steady feeling. The divorced Xiaomei said that she first saw Dongzi because he had a good temper, and her occasional willfulness can be tolerated, which made her feel very satisfied. However, the reason for the divorce now is also because Dongzi has a “too good” temper. Not only is he unable to make decisions about major issues at home, he is always pinched by people outside, and has even affected the harmony of the family. Dongzi entered the research institute. The working environment was relatively simple and there was basically no intrigue. However, when he returned home, he looked like he was inhumane, and he didn’t care about anything. Xiaomei works in the marketing department of a foreign-funded enterprise. There is competition everywhere in the workplace, and she is always facing intrigue, but she still has the heart to do it when she returns home! In the first two years, the couple bought a house with great difficulty. From choosing the apartment type, obtaining loans to decorating, all the things big and small were all things Xiaomei was in. At the beginning, Dongzi said: “You just look like it, I don’t have any opinion”, and Xiaomei was deeply moved. When she was so busy, Xiao Mei found out that Dongzi said “no objection” was to be a shopkeeper, or to wait for her to arrange everything. When the decoration was about to end, Xiaomei went on a business trip, and she was too busy with her work to communicate with the decoration team. After returning home, he found that not only did Dongzi not play a role in supervising the construction, but he also rashly signed the completion confirmation. The tiles in the bathroom were crookedly pasted, and the curtains in the bedroom were also short, so angry that Xiaomei had to spend extra money to find a worker to redo it. Last year, Dongzi’s cousin came to the house and said that he had recently taken a fancy to a good investment project and wanted to borrow some money from his brother and sister-in-law. Xiao Mei felt that it was inconvenient for herself to refuse, after all, being a sister-in-law left a stingy impression. But Dongzi also thought that he couldn’t speak, and eventually lent 80,000 yuan to his brother. By this year, Xiaomei’s father fell ill and was hospitalized, and the family urgently needed money. However, Dongzi couldn’t save face to get the foreign debt back, and said to Xiaomei: “You didn’t say not to borrow this money at the beginning. How can you let me open this mouth now?” All kinds of things are getting worse. Xiao Mei felt that instead of saying that her husband had a good temper, it was better to say that he was not responsible or responsible. Although I don’t expect Dongzi to support a family, but now this “women are strong and men are weak” situation, I really have no choice but to do it. Internally, Dongzi seldom takes the initiative to take responsibility, leaving everything to his wife to do, with the nickname “You are happy.” Externally, he did not take any responsibility for the matter that the Dongzi came forward. It was obviously a joint decision of the husband and wife, but once he encountered troubles, he said, “You can figure it out, I can’t control it, it has nothing to do with me…” Husband This “you figure it out” attitude is simply a kind of cold violence. In the eyes of outsiders, it is a “good sir” who is not to blame for anyone, but in fact there is no sense of responsibility. Just as Zhang Ailing commented on the husband of her best friend Su Qing: She is not bad but she is not responsible, and she kidnapped his wife with her self-esteem. Husband and wife form a small family together. Although the division of labor between the two parties may be different, some people take charge of the outside and make more money, and some take care of the inside and are more concerned about housework. But it is inevitable that both husband and wife need to take responsibility together and be willing to devote time and energy to the small family. A man who says “you figure it out” not only does not show enough respect for his wife, but he also habitually regards her as an “mother” and “nanny”. This state of peace of mind and enjoying the care of his wife will undoubtedly make the sweet love be disrupted by firewood, rice, oil, salt and trivialities, which not only exposes the lack of responsibility, but also makes marriage life a red light! Do you have any thoughts on today’s topic? Welcome to leave a comment, and communicate with us. Writing is not easy, please help me to leave a message forward, Dr. Yudi, thank you! Disclaimer: My